How to Change Limiting Beliefs

Most of us feel inadequate in some way or another.

Maybe you tell yourself you aren’t quite the parent you wish you were, aren’t achieving enough to deserve a raise at work, or aren’t ready yet to start your own business.

Telling ourselves the story that we aren’t enough makes us feel ashamed, and shame keeps us stuck. 

So how do you change limiting beliefs so you can move forward?

Simply being aware of these beliefs is not enough.

In order to change your perspective, you need to look beneath these feelings of unworthiness to find out how you’re defining “good enough” in the first place.

Here’s what I mean:

Just the other day, a man told me that he wanted to meet more people, but he felt very uncomfortable speaking about himself. He didn’t think he was interesting enough.

He explained that he couldn’t see why anyone would care to hear about him and how he’d spent his time, unless that person had the same interests.

But when I asked him what makes someone else interesting, he said, “Oh, I love talking to other people and learning what they like.”

“Even if the thing they’re talking about isn’t something you’re interested in doing yourself?” I probed.

“Yes,” he admitted. “if it’s something they’re excited about, then that makes them interesting regardless...”

By considering what made someone else “interesting”, he was able to realise that he actually fit his own definition and that he, too, could be interesting. Once he was able to embrace the idea that people wanted to hear what he had to say, he felt more comfortable meeting new people.

Do you have a story about how you’re “not enough”? 

Rather than letting the same script play over and over in the background, ask yourself how you define that characteristic in somebody else. What would it take for you to feel someone else was “enough” in that area?

You may just find you already match up.