Why I Don't Recommend "Being Positive"

In my work, one thing that I see a lot is people setting the intention to “be positive”.

But I really don’t recommend this one...

As we adapt to the ways our lives are changing right now, it might feel like a good idea to set the intention to keep a positive perspective. 

And this is a worthwhile goal. After all, your perspective colours the way that everything feels and defines whether you’re feeling helpless and stuck or motivated and optimistic.

But here’s the thing:

We can’t feel positive just because we tell ourselves to feel that way. That is simply not how positive emotions work.

Let’s imagine that you wanted to get physically healthy. You’d never tell yourself to “just think yourself healthy”, would you? Of course not. You intuitively know that you have to go and do certain things that improve your physical health - like get good sleep, eat balanced meals, and exercise. 

Physical health happens in the condition of the right healthy habits.

And, in the same way, feeling positive happens when you’re doing things to nurture your resilience.

Telling yourself to “be positive” without taking steps to nurture your resilience is like setting a goal without having any means to reach that goal... and that's a painful, hopeless place I don't want anyone to be.

So I'd love to hear, friend, what are you doing to do to tend to yourself right now and nurture a positive state of mind?

P.S. I've just released an online course called Coronavirus: Coping with Anxiety and Social Isolation, specifically designed to help you to cope better with the ways Coronavirus regulations and social distancing are affecting your life, work, and ability to feel connected to others. Check it out here.